Fifty Shades of Grey, Starring Dakota Johnson and Jamie Dornan, was sexy and true to the novel by E.L. James. This is one of the few times that a ﬁlm lived up to the book.
The audience was a mixed bag: couples, girlfriends, single, creepy old men, middle aged women, and a clown, but hey, I live in New York City. There were collective gasps, laughter, and chatter that normally would be annoying, but somehow made the viewing of Fifty Shades that much more awesome. There is a reason over 100 million people have read it privately. It is a trip to share that experience publicly. Spoiler alert on this review: I freaking loved it. So haters…ﬁnd another article- this is a love fest.
Reading is a very personal pastime. We envision the characters and almost always the movie in our head is better than what Hollywood can produce. Especially with erotic literature, the reader has a pre conceived fantastical casting that always projects themselves onto either the protagonist or the antagonist. The majority of readers of Fifty Shades are women…therefore; most ladies are seeing themselves as Anastasia during the telling of the tale. That is why the casting directors nailed it with Dakota Johnson. She was absolutely perfect as Anastasia. She even out-shined Jamie Dornan (even though he was absolutely stunning to look at and lust over) which was a big surprise to me. Why was she perfect? Because she was not too perfect of a woman. She has ﬂaws. Her boobs are small and her butt is ﬂeshy, but she is really beautiful and classic in style. Her hair is messy and she has bags under her eyes, but somehow looks sexy and at home in her body. She is goofy and awkward, but at the snap of a ﬁnger or riding crop or spanking or belt can look like the women we all wish we looked like in bed (hard to know when you have a blindfold on- am I right?!). That makes her the perfect Anastasia Steele. Her humour made the movie work because we could laugh at the extreme circumstances and surprises that are Christian Grey.
When I walked out of the theater tonight I heard a group of girls talking about how hot Jamie Dornan was, “I almost want to buy a poster and put it on my bedroom wall…”, “Right! When he entered the playroom in those ripped up jeans hanging off his hips I almost died…”, “She was so awkward- what was her deal?!”, “I’m really surprised they cast her- Jamie Dornan would never f$%k that girl.” Case in point. Bravo casting directors. You made all the women jealous of Anastasia. They all want to be her! They can’t stand it! And these are grown women- not 13 year old girls outside a New Kids on the Block concert. Oy- I am totally giving away my age… Dakota is about to have a huge career and I am excited to see what she will do next. The girl can really act. Although acting like you love Jamie Dornan isn’t hard.
Jamie Dornan. A god among men. Chiselled, understated, and absolutely breathe taking to look at. I am disappointed that the ﬁlm wasn’t NC-17 because I realllllyyyy wanted to see more. He is Irish (or English or Welsh????), and sometimes his accent came across a bit, but overall I enjoyed his performance. He is especially effective when he is getting it on…in the bedroom or the playroom- that is where I want to see him. The book made him feel a bit more dangerous but Jamie holds his own as Christian. Perhaps I am objectifying him, but so what- thank god we ladies get a chance once in a while! His abs screams to be touched. You get two or three butt shots in the movie, and what a butt it is! The slight curl in his hair makes you want to know what he was like in high school. And his eyes are the key to any woman’s panty dropping muscle. But seriously. His eyes are incredibly magnetizing. And my panties did drop, but that is because I’m wearing the ones that lost the elastic…don’t judge- my dude is out of town. The ﬁrst scene where Ana and Christian meet is crucial. That is where they must set the stage for an unforgettable connection and romance (although Christian doesn’t “do” romance). That scene worked and had me at “hello” because both actors were incredibly connected and it showed in their eyes. That scene was the foreplay for the rest of the movie.
The sex scenes were pretty classy. I wanted trashy, but that is a personal thing I will work on in therapy. There was some slow motion head whipping and panting that I could have done without, but overall it was hot. These books are full of sex, so to keep the audience wanting more is key. The ﬁlm accomplished this in the effort- we will see how they do in the next two.
At the end of the ﬁlm we get a cliff hanger. Looks like it won’t work out for these two…She doesn’t like it so rough and he just can’t seem to share his demons…But we fans know better. There is much to come for Ana and Christian (pun intended of course). I have been hooked and can’t wait for the next episode. In the meantime I have some serious research to do…
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Fifty Shades of Grey might not be high art, but it is sexy, fun, and entertaining. Go see it with your person or some friends. Surprisingly it is not an awkward movie to see with others. Trust me- you will want to talk about it!
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